Philosophy for Writing & Editing Your Life
The Heartbreak Book About You, Not Love and Relationships
You crawled through the day feeling sad, angry, and disappointed from your latest heartbreak, but now you’re almost back at home where you can wallow in your pain.
You press the Up arrow in the lobby of your apartment building to summon the elevator.
Only a few more moments before you can indulge in your fuck-the-world attitude in private.
But then a neighbor arrives home from a long day at work, as well, and you wait for the elevator together.
“Hi, how are you?” she asks.
You give her a quick glance but don’t respond and go back to looking down at your feet.
When you get in the elevator, you press the number of the floor you live on and do not ask where she is going.
As she jets out her arm in front of you to press the button she needs, you’re even more frustrated that she came in such close contact with you.
Everyone is irritating.
Everything is wrong.
Nothing is comforting.
You’re consumed with your own personal book of heartbreak. [Click to continue ... ]
Warning: Your Fulfilled Desires Will Leave You Stranded
In elementary school, the monkey bars were my scene during recess.
Unaware we were actually getting exercise—one of the reasons for recess—my friends and I regarded the physical activity as a way to socialize.
The different types of playground equipment were the youth equivalents of coffee shops and nightclubs.
Older girls always sat on top of the monkey bars, forming a tree house of sorts where they surveyed the playground and gossiped.
My days of simply doing pull-ups and hanging from the structure seemed numbered; if I wanted to grow up, I needed to learn how they climbed up through the bars to bask in all their glory.
I studied the Monkey Bar Queens’ techniques for weeks, noting how they positioned the palms of their hands and the moments when they paused to get their balance.
One day after school, when I didn’t have to be rushed back to class, I decided I was ready.
I swung to the spot I desired, pulled my legs up, and thrust my feet through the horizontal ladder to give myself leverage to pull the rest of my body through the opening.
My fingers tightly gripped the cross-section of the bars as I adjusted into a sitting position.
I was pretty much a professional gymnast. [Click to continue ... ]
Heartbreak 101: Dissecting the Pain
“Did that hurt?”
The man in front of me in line at Starbucks pointed to the rose tattoos on my upper arms.
Before I had a chance to answer, he continued.
“That’s cool. I like pain, too. That’s why I got married.” Smirk.
The lack of caffeine in my bloodstream made it difficult to reply.
“Ahh, uh huh,” I giggled.
He wanted to chat, but since I’ve had the “I want to get tattoos, too” conversation countless times with his faceless counterparts, I wasn’t interested.
A stranger is not the best person to advise you about a permanent marking on your skin.
Besides, I already got what I needed: I like pain, too. That’s why I got married???
“Have a good day!” I affirmed, trying not to be rude, as I hurriedly stuck a straw in my green tea latte and went on my way. [Click to continue ... ]
Get Rid of Broken Heart Pain Once and for All
Ouch.
You quickly pull back the finger that accidentally brushed against the pan on your stove set to medium heat, shaking your hand to relieve the stinging sensation.
Pain from a hot burner makes us rethink our actions and creates an awareness of our surroundings.
We proceed more cautiously because we don’t want to burn our hands again.
With pain from heartbreak, we don’t assume the same responsibility.
We don’t define a broken heart properly and note that the pain is a signal for us to remove ourselves.
Instead of taking extra care to avoid repeating the mistake, we revisit the pain.
Getting over heartbreak isn’t our goal. We want to fix the broken heart.
We want to touch the hot stove without consequences. [Click to continue ... ]
