7 Lies About Getting Over Heartbreak

Getting Over Heartbreak. Photo Credit – Flickr: John KoetsierFriends and family have benevolent intentions when you turn to them for help as you’re getting over heartbreak.

But those people want to make you feel better, so they’re not going to tell you the truth.

The truth hurts.

Lies may comfort you and provide temporary relief as your spinning head tries to pick up the pieces of your broken heart.

They serve as makeshift hope that prevents you from completely shutting down.

Will they give you long-term satisfaction?

Here are seven soothing sentiments, but irrelevant lies your close companions will tell you about how to overcome heartbreak.

1. It will be okay.

It won’t be okay. You’ll be a different person.

2. Time will help.

You don’t need time if you immediately recognize a change has occurred that you need to incorporate into your life. There’s no getting used to it. This is it. Rip off your denial like a band-aid and deal with the heartbreak presented to you.

3. You’ll find something better.

Positioning situations as “better” or “worse” makes you resent the past, and you need to appreciate the past in order to move forward. You’ll find something different and a better fit for who you are now. What you had (and lost) fit you at the time, but things have changed.

4. You can’t give up.

Give up. You can’t recreate what you had and don’t need a replica of the dynamic that worked for you at a certain time. Something new will appear even if you give up.

5. You’re only remembering the good things.

Remembering “good things” causes pain because you think they’re not part of your present circumstance. No magical heartbreak cure will make you view memories clearly.

6. You won’t make the same mistakes again.

Yes, you will. Because we always prefer fantasies over realities. The fantasy of what could be is so much more pleasant than reality, so we ignore it.

7. It’ll make you stronger.

You won’t necessarily be stronger when you get over heartbreak. When you think you’re over it, you may not be at all. Although you’re not aware of the symptoms anymore, there may be habitual effects of heartbreak you don’t notice that shape your identity in detrimental ways.

What lies do you hear about getting over heartbreak? Tweet about it.
Heartbreak Cure


Stefanie Flaxman is the creator of @RevisionFairy and author of a new book about heartbreak.

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